So many things are making this summer odd. I've typed and deleted much of this post over and over. I want to say many things, but realise how whiny they are! I know how to look on the bright side of life, to focus on the donut and not the hole, and to count my blessings and name them one by one. But, by golly, I WANT someone to play with. To laugh with. To cry on someone's shoulder and feel important. Or at least, loved.
As I have mentioned before, my entire life has been training me for this summer. I had to laugh at The Craftsman when he said he missed me. Even when I'm around, he rarely is. He said he should do something about that, I just smiled to myself. Nothing will change. I think I startled mom when I told her I didn't have any dreams or hopes for the future. It isn't because I don't want to, it is because none of the ones I HAD made ever happened.
Sure, I could make them happen. If I wanted to do them alone, which makes The Craftsman feel bad. It is a lot like shopping. I do NOT like shopping. I can't afford many of the things I want, so why look? I can't even afford many of the things I think I need. My supplies to keep me alive are the most important items on my personal shopping list, anything else is superfluous. It all works out eventually and life goes on. It always does.
So, pass me those crazy pickle things. Cheers!