As I sat in the bathroom in the latter half of my second prep for my second colonoscopy (it appears the one I had in my 40’s might not have given adequate answers), I thought about some things to share. The prep for these procedures is always a chore. You have to refrain from eating certain things and the last day consists of liquid only. It is enough to drive one to white wine, if I liked wine, and it was on the list of things to consume.
There fore, this is Kris’s addendum to a bowel prep procedure.
Things to do five days before the scheduled procedure:
1. When your spouse brings out freshly popped popcorn to eat
while watching TV. Move as far away as possible. Just do it.
2. Avoid eating out. It is much less work to stay home than
decide what you can and can’t have.
3. Rest as much as possible. You will need this later. Trust
Things to do the day prior to your procedure:
1. Do not do housework or yard work during your cleanse.
This is not an option.
2. Make sure everyone knows you have top priority in the
bathroom. No exceptions. It is also nice to have more than
one working bathroom, but this isn’t always an option.
3. Don’t do any cooking. The scent of bacon, melting butter
on toast, or even Kraft mac and cheese when you are on a
liquid diet is worse than having a headache in a beginning
4. Shop for everything you might need before you start this
experience. The cleanse solution is not always as palatable as
the directions say and a mouthful of 7-up after is a relief.
5. You will often need to make a hasty entrance into your
bathroom. Turning on lights, lifting toilet lids, and unzipping
jeans use valuable time. Take this into consideration.
The day of, you will be tired and cranky and probably hungry. Try not to bite the hand that is driving you to and from the hospital. They will not understand until it happens to them, let them wait. It is good for them.
I’ve been fortunate enough to be asleep for my procedures. It is better this way. Losing time versus experiencing this intimate act first hand, is a definite plus. Once you are released, you may want ice cream. Be advised this operation you had was not a tonsillectomy and just wait. You may want scrambled eggs or other soft tasty food. Encourage the person you live with to make this for you. If they don't, jelly beans and saltines make a fine substitute. Ignore any of the foods other people might be indulging in, forgetful of your plight. Soon, you will be able to participate freely once more in culinary delights, as long as you don't need to drive to reach them those first 24 hours.
All in all, this highly personal undertaking is one most of us have also gone through. The top things you will need in order to get through it is rest, a book, and a sense of humor. But, more than likely the rest part will prevail.